“Jay has been great, yes, like from the outside things are so perfect and things are so great, but actually like, they’re not, and that sucks, and it sucks.” – Kristin Cavallari, portray an image describing the ups and downs of her marriage to Jay Cutler.
First there was Smokin’ Jay — the wildly in style viral sensation that includes NFL quarterback Jay Cutler in numerous “Don’t Care! poses, with a photo-shopped cigarette dangling from his mouth.
Then, courtesy of “Very Cavallari,” we met Farmin’ Jay — an amiable, wisecracking, camo-wearing goof spending his post-football days searching and cooking meat and elevating chickens.
Now, within the sixth episode of season two, we meet …
Drunken Jay.
Oh boy.
“Guess what?” Kristin says to Jay on the outset of this episode. “All my friends are coming to town! You’re so excited.”
Jay: “Eh.”
So right here’s the deal. Some of Kristin’s L.A. mates, together with Biegs and Pip and Justin, are coming to go to. They’ll be staying at Kristin’s outdated home in Nashville, which is available on the market for greater than $7 million however hasn’t offered.
“Nobody in L.A. has a house like this!” exclaims Kristin’s good friend Justin.
Well. I’m gonna guess perhaps only a FEW people in L.A. have multi-million-dollar mansions.
Kristin hosts a cocktail party on the outdated home — however in fact there must be a promotional tie-in, so the visitors will likely be eating on fare created by “Chef Mike, Friend, Cookbook Author” for Kristin’s subsequent cookbook.
“We’re actually recipe testing,” explains Kristin.
The pressure between Kristin and Jay is clear from the second they sit down for the banquet. It seems Jay has been well-lubricated earlier than he joined the group.
When the dialog turns to relationships and the dynamic involving who’s the breadwinner, Jay factors to Kristin and says:
“She’s the ‘bread spender.’ If Kristin wants to buy something, she buys it.”
And then, placing air quotes across the phrase ‘we,’ Jay says, “If there’s something we pay for, we pay for it.”
With that, Jay takes a goblet of wine and his cellphone, and leaves the dinner desk.
Per the standard “Very Cav” construction, we minimize forwards and backwards between three or 4 operating storylines.
Brittainy, the pinnacle of operations for Kristin’s Uncommon James model, continues to be butting heads with Matt, who has been moved from delivery to customer support however continues to be an issue worker.
At one level, the ever-woe-is-me Matt asks Brittainy if she doesn’t like him as a result of he’s a “boy.”
Dear Matt: I’m certain you’re a pleasant individual and a greater than competent employee in actual life. In phrases of the narrative of this present, you have to go away.
Another subplot includes Brittainy and her boyfriend Stone, a self-involved musician who’s one among my least favourite characters on “Very Cavallari.” I preserve hoping Brittainy will inform Stone to take a hike and go write an album about how he screwed up his relationship with Brittainy.
Hmmmm. I’m beginning to sense a sample right here. Whether Brittainy is concerned in a piece confrontation with a whiny colleague or a private disaster along with her inattentive boyfriend, I believe I’m Team Brittainy!
One of my favourite all-time moments in “Very Cavallari” happens when Kristin and Jay basically break the fourth wall and acknowledge this complete factor is equal elements actuality and manufactured drama.
After a poignant second through which Kristin calls out Jay for being a jerk and Jay apologizes, Kristin says to Jay, “I’m going to put the kids’ laundry away” — however she will’t maintain her dramatic expression.
“What a f—ing lie!” says Jay. “You can’t even keep a straight face.”
“I do that sometimes,” protests Kristin.
“You don’t even know where that s— goes,” says Jay.
“F— off, that is not true…” says Kristin. “All right. I’m going to go eat.”
“I believe that,” says Jay.
Me too.